Tuesday, May 30, 2006
On my way home from the station I passed six dogs. They all looked like this:
Or this:
The worst type of dogs.
The best type of dogs were conspicuous by their absence.
I mean this type of dog:
Or this type of dog:
As with so many things, I blame Snoop.
Snoop: dunderheaded.
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Or this:
The worst type of dogs.
The best type of dogs were conspicuous by their absence.
I mean this type of dog:
Or this type of dog:
As with so many things, I blame Snoop.
Snoop: dunderheaded.
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The pink grapefruit.
When chilled it is the king of fruits. So sweet, and so sharp: nature's tangfastic.
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When chilled it is the king of fruits. So sweet, and so sharp: nature's tangfastic.
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Monday, May 29, 2006
Wednesday, May 24, 2006
I'm unusually multi-coloured today. I feel self-conscious.
From the bottom:
Soles of shoes: black
Body of shoes/boots: brown
Trousers: blue and white; tight stripe
Shirt: white
Jumper: green trim; purple and navy hoop.
Me, today.
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From the bottom:
Soles of shoes: black
Body of shoes/boots: brown
Trousers: blue and white; tight stripe
Shirt: white
Jumper: green trim; purple and navy hoop.
Me, today.
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Yesterday someone said I reminded them of Alexander Hleb.
I couldn't really remember what he looks like.
A monkey, as it turns out.
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I couldn't really remember what he looks like.
A monkey, as it turns out.
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Tuesday, May 23, 2006
Friday, May 19, 2006
Worst nationalities on which women may base a fancy:
1) Irish
2) Italian
3) South African
There's nothing wrong with these nationalities, fine proud nations all, but please: get a grip.
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1) Irish
2) Italian
3) South African
There's nothing wrong with these nationalities, fine proud nations all, but please: get a grip.
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And by the way, I liked Mark Heap before you. I liked him when he was in "The Two Marks", street-entertainers at the Glasgow May fest, 1985.
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It's so predictable. Jane goes out for the evening so I drink wine, watch TV and blog into an indifferent world. Then again, always my finest hours.
You put the "b" before "itch".
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You put the "b" before "itch".
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Big Brother: What's it like to be in the Big Brother house?
Everyone: Whoo! Amazing! Fucking brilliant!
Pete: It's alright, I suppose.
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Everyone: Whoo! Amazing! Fucking brilliant!
Pete: It's alright, I suppose.
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Thursday, May 18, 2006
Saturday, May 13, 2006
Daniel Dyer is a cunt, apparently.
UPDATE: I was drunk when I wrote that. I have no idea who he is, or what he's done wrong.
UPDATE 2: He's in Human Traffic. I haven't seen it, hence my "apparently".
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UPDATE: I was drunk when I wrote that. I have no idea who he is, or what he's done wrong.
UPDATE 2: He's in Human Traffic. I haven't seen it, hence my "apparently".
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Friday, May 12, 2006
Yesterday in the Financial Times there was a letter from a woman who works on Wall Street. Everyone in her office eats food from vending machines at their desks - that's the culture of the office. She wants to know if she'd be within her rights to pop out for half an hour and eat her lunch somewhere else.
Here are the responses she received:
"Forget about taking nice lunch breaks (at least until you become a VP and only then with clients). If you want to make it in this business, there are only three things you need to know - work, work harder and work even harder (at least until you become a managing director)."
"THIS IS A PROBLEM??This is kids' stuff. You bring good quality food with you and eat when you're hungry. You can NOT go out to lunch if you work on the Street, period. Get used to it or find a new career."
"Do what the rest of us do on the Street: get up around 4:30 and go to the gym to work off the junk food. You're working in an industry where at any minute of the day you could pick up the phone and write the ticket that makes your year, and for that matter, that pays you much better than almost any other job/career you could find. So, bottom line, suck it up and get back to work."
And finally, some sympathetic words from a "Financier, male, 46":
"Lunch isn't for wimps, it's for building client relationships. It is high time you built up your firm's client profile through a well-structured series of working lunches. If anybody looks askance, remind them this is a people business."
Are you weeping yet?
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Here are the responses she received:
"Forget about taking nice lunch breaks (at least until you become a VP and only then with clients). If you want to make it in this business, there are only three things you need to know - work, work harder and work even harder (at least until you become a managing director)."
"THIS IS A PROBLEM??This is kids' stuff. You bring good quality food with you and eat when you're hungry. You can NOT go out to lunch if you work on the Street, period. Get used to it or find a new career."
"Do what the rest of us do on the Street: get up around 4:30 and go to the gym to work off the junk food. You're working in an industry where at any minute of the day you could pick up the phone and write the ticket that makes your year, and for that matter, that pays you much better than almost any other job/career you could find. So, bottom line, suck it up and get back to work."
And finally, some sympathetic words from a "Financier, male, 46":
"Lunch isn't for wimps, it's for building client relationships. It is high time you built up your firm's client profile through a well-structured series of working lunches. If anybody looks askance, remind them this is a people business."
Are you weeping yet?
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Thursday, May 11, 2006
Media deliberately misunderstands trade-offs again:
"Resourcing blamed over July bombs
A lack of resources prevented security services from intercepting the 7 July London bombers, a report has claimed."
Well of course it could have been prevented with more resources, any one thing could have been. If we could afford a pro-Western observer to monitor every muslim then there would be no terrorism by muslims - anyone who looked a bit shifty would be wrestled to the ground immediately. Similarly, if all children had a vetted bodyguard, there'd be no child abductions. But we can't have everything: among other things we've got a National Lottery to run.
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"Resourcing blamed over July bombs
A lack of resources prevented security services from intercepting the 7 July London bombers, a report has claimed."
Well of course it could have been prevented with more resources, any one thing could have been. If we could afford a pro-Western observer to monitor every muslim then there would be no terrorism by muslims - anyone who looked a bit shifty would be wrestled to the ground immediately. Similarly, if all children had a vetted bodyguard, there'd be no child abductions. But we can't have everything: among other things we've got a National Lottery to run.
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Wednesday, May 10, 2006
Alan Giles, chief executive of the HMV Group, calls the Apprentice as he sees it:
"Alan Sugar does everyone a great disservice by doing it. Young people will be turned off because they think they will be shouted at by a horrible fat old rich bloke."
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"Alan Sugar does everyone a great disservice by doing it. Young people will be turned off because they think they will be shouted at by a horrible fat old rich bloke."
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Tuesday, May 09, 2006
I note the London Olympians play at Crystal Palace. I’m up for a season ticket – hope there’s someone out there who’ll join me for a game.
Nothing like a faded British facsimile of an American creation.
Dallas Cowboys Cheerleading Squad
All American
The Olympian Tygerz
A Bit Ropey
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Nothing like a faded British facsimile of an American creation.
Dallas Cowboys Cheerleading Squad
All American
The Olympian Tygerz
A Bit Ropey
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Currently (and for the purposes of this post) my two major distractions are astronauts and American football. I’m like a ten year old Texan in 1963. Looking forward to those “Beatles”.
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Notes made while watching The Right Stuff yesterday evening (may be annotated later):
how could you not want to be a pilot?
jeff goldblum and harry shearer
did Sam Shepherd as Chuck Yeager define for me at a young age what a man should be? A model I've conspicuously failed to live up to.
testing - centrifugal chimp.
nostalgia for a past when the future meant something.
whatever happened to dennis quaid? breaking away then the right stuff then inner space. a tragedy. He was coming on like a young jack nicholson
lance henrikson!
fred ward!
”hey, did you hear that? we're competing with archie and jughead.”
you yearn for yeager. you don't understand where he's gone. you're bereft once the selection process starts.
funnier than i remembered - "our germans are better than their germans".
that little suckass, John Glenn. "Forget John Glenn, I want Chuck Yeager for President."
about three steps from tears.
the masturbating in cups confused me as a child.
man, the fucking risks involved.
alan motherfucking shepherd.
Yeah, fuck you NASA! Fuck you LBJ (good performance, btw) - no one fucks with the Mercury boys!
no! not a terrible "wisdom of aborigines" bit! this isn't the doors!
john glen's not such a bad sort.
Alan shepherd - walks on the moon.
Where's the right stuff 2? Of course Scott Glen. Proper myths. Proper.
Fucking-A Bubba.
And outside in London I can’t see one star.
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how could you not want to be a pilot?
jeff goldblum and harry shearer
did Sam Shepherd as Chuck Yeager define for me at a young age what a man should be? A model I've conspicuously failed to live up to.
testing - centrifugal chimp.
nostalgia for a past when the future meant something.
whatever happened to dennis quaid? breaking away then the right stuff then inner space. a tragedy. He was coming on like a young jack nicholson
lance henrikson!
fred ward!
”hey, did you hear that? we're competing with archie and jughead.”
you yearn for yeager. you don't understand where he's gone. you're bereft once the selection process starts.
funnier than i remembered - "our germans are better than their germans".
that little suckass, John Glenn. "Forget John Glenn, I want Chuck Yeager for President."
about three steps from tears.
the masturbating in cups confused me as a child.
man, the fucking risks involved.
alan motherfucking shepherd.
Yeah, fuck you NASA! Fuck you LBJ (good performance, btw) - no one fucks with the Mercury boys!
no! not a terrible "wisdom of aborigines" bit! this isn't the doors!
john glen's not such a bad sort.
Alan shepherd - walks on the moon.
Where's the right stuff 2? Of course Scott Glen. Proper myths. Proper.
Fucking-A Bubba.
And outside in London I can’t see one star.
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Monday, May 08, 2006
Of course being offered free tickets to Springsteen tonight and having to turn them down as I'll be at work.
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Thursday, May 04, 2006
Wednesday, May 03, 2006
Just how good is the Cruiser?
Time's sleathy creep gathers pace.
Today I realised that two entire generations had been through my college since I went there; next year will be ten years since I started.
A recent wake-up call came watching Jerry Maguire at Christmas. The Renée Zellweger character - though old before her time - is now younger than me. Younger... than... me... So were I single, I'd be competing with the Cruiser for women - that's just not fair. The first time I saw it she was as far away as my parents. I still think of myself as a teenager: until I meet teenagers, then I think they're like children.
By the time Loretta Lynn was a year or so older than me she was a grandmother.
I'm thinking about picking up a games console on ebay.
UPDATE: Two of the candidates (including Paul Tulip) on the Apprentice are 25.
25!
UPDATE 2: I have bids on a Gamecube and Madden.
Update 3! I have bought a Gamecube: four years behind the curve.
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